My Life-Or Maybe Just A Glimpse

Sorry!

2007-02-11T17:14:00.000-07:00

Sorry I haven't posted in so long. Lots of stuff. Heart Ball. Dress shopping. Project. Stuff.
Anyhow, wanted to anyone who's reading I'm alive. So, no one should be worrying because no one reads this! Haha.

Anyhow, I think I might be putting some of my characters up. So...Yeah.

Mmm'yah

2007-02-03T18:49:00.000-07:00

I am so tired it is not even funny. Last night was crazy, man. And today I got 3-4 hours of sleep. I am dragging.

But...I have become infatuated with Brendon Urie! Aaah. That's right-from Panic! at the Disco. ^^ Mmm. He's sexy in a different kind of way and his voice-! My gosh. Wow.

Anyhow. Yeah. There's going to be pictures of him up here soon because, well, I love him! <3 Even more than my manga peoples! Except maybe Sanzo. Haha.

Anyhow. Here's this really cool clip of Captain Jack Sparrow. You'll love it. I did. However...no one reads this, so I'm going to be the only one watching it, right? Sigh. That's depressing. Whatever. Here it is.

http://www.flixster.com/servlet/embed/video/link/3185850

I love it! The person who made it is AMAZING! Hahaha.

You know, Alphonse is so nice to me. I was complaining how my printer wasn't working and he offered to print it for me. He never did stuff like this before. It's nice...until he drops a Gazelle Bomb. I've decided that's what I'm going to call it now. A Gazelle Bomb. Because that's what it is. A bomb in my face that blows up every good feeling I have as soon as he mentions her. *sigh*

But he picked her.

And mebbe now he's realizing what's he missing from this side of the fence. You know, I love Gazelle, I really do. And it's only been since last week that I'm feeling so weird about it. I mean, aside from the first two weeks they started going out. I was fine after that. And now....Now, everything's screwed up. Badly. I think I'm still in love with Alphonse.

He just asked me what he should get her for Valentine's Day. Me. His best friend. And the other girl. And...I told him what to do and even offered to take him shopping so his parents won't know about him and Gazelle.

I am an awesome best friend, just lemme say that.

But I don't know what to do. I think I'm just going to...let it pass. I still have Hastings, don't I? Yes, I do! ^^ That makes me considerably happier.

Luv.
Izzy

Deeeead Tired-And There's Nothing To Do About It

2007-02-03T00:21:00.000-07:00

I'm so tired, but I have to stay up all night for my friend's Science project. We're watching Forrest Gump and it's so good-and so sad! Well...

The last few days have been crazy. I mean, really. I don't even want to talk about it. Even here. Even on my sort of "diary." Sigh. It's so...weird. I've decided I'm boycotting Valentine's Day-and it's rather got to do with Alphonse and Gazelle. And other people. But mostly Alphonse. Doing a project with him is bad. Really bad. I've been almost...detoxed from him since he and Gazelle have been going out, but...It's bad.

See ya.

The World Is Going Crazy-And Me Along With It.

2007-01-29T18:53:00.000-07:00

*big sigh* Today sucked. Kit has been so mean to me lately and I don't know WHY! I've done nothing wrong, have I? No. And I apologized to him about the papers. But the eraser...that was not my fault! Okay. Well. I did throw it at him. But only because he threw it at me. And I am NOT a SuperBitch. Am I?

Anyhow. Hastings and I are emailing! Yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay! And he just said he loved me. ^^ Could we possibly be getting back together? Woooow. What an idea.

Meh. I feel cold though. Cold and unhappy and depressed and unloved. And since no one reads this, it doesn't even really matter, now does it? Nope. This is why I feel unloved. Because I am. *shakes head* And...being with Alphonse yesterday was horrible. Mostly I've blocked myself off from him and Gazelle, but being around with him and with no one else (Miguel and Frita don't count) was baaaad. It loosened me up. And it hurt. BIG TIME. Like ice clenching my heart and slowly squeezing everytihng out. *shudder* It hurt really bad. And it still does. Even though I'm talking to Hastings! Ugh.

I missed Javier's party this weekend. It makes me feel horrible. He said it was all right...but everyone was talking about it. I feel really bad. And then Kit has to go and call me on it at every moment he can! God. He is an idiot. I hate him right now. I mean...Urggh. Not cool.

I'm feeling so confused. And tired. And hurt and hungry...I hate it. I hate it all. I'm jsut praying, I mean, really, I am! I'm praying that it will all get better. Because I can't stand the road my life is hurtling towards.

And no, I'm not talking about committing suicide, thankyouverymuch. I couldn't ever do something like that.

Byes...And much loves.

Saiyuki! Saiyuki Gensomaden. ^^ Yup. I love it. xD

2007-01-23T17:40:00.000-07:00

The Saiyuki expedition! Yaaaay! Okay. So I'm bored. Sorry. But-this is my favorite anime

and I thought what the heck, I like it, so everyone should see it. ^^

Mwahahaha. I am so evil. Anyhow-

From left to right they are

Goku

Gojyo

Hakkai

Sanzo

Yaaaay! Sanzo is my favorite! If you've seen my binders, you'll notice he's on each one. Haha.

And here they are!

*look doooowwwwwn*

This is Sha Gojyo. He's from Saiyuki, my ultimate-favorite Japanese manga EVAH. Ghehehehe. He's very cool. Mr. Playboy. Smoker. The Master of Oaths. Still, you gotta love him and his coolio axe/staff thing. Verrrry cool. ^^

This is Genjyo Sanzo, in his modern-time clothes. Even though he doesn't live in them. Hehe. He is my FAVORITE! He's a priest and he has a small Smith-Wesson gun and he loves to smoke. Marlboro Red only. Haahaha. LOVE HIM! <3>

This is Son Goku. He's considered the kid of the group, even though he's over 500 years old. He's the Monkey King and Sanzo found him in a mountain and took care of him. ^^ He fights with a nyoi-boi and is always ALWAYS hungry. I love him too. ^^

This is Cho Hakkai. He's verry cool. He's considered the mother of the group. He has a transforming dragon, Jeep, who turns into a JEEP! Haha. He uses chi manipulation as his weapon. He's a demon (youkai) because he "bathed in the blood of a thousand youkai." He's sweet and the best poker player.

Excited Out of My Wits!

2007-01-23T16:59:00.000-07:00

Oooh yeahh baby! Hahaha. Tonight, I'm going to the high school for a little Open House. What fun. Lol. I'm really excited though. I know Summer and Kit and Gazelle and Alphonse are going. Tara might. She's not sure. It's pretty cool though! I am, like I said, very happy!

The band teacher came again today. He had to audition some more people. I am so hoping that I'll be in one of the more advanced bands. That would be amazing, wouldn't it? I think he thought I was good. He did ask if I was taking privat lessons. xD

Mmm. Today was pretty good, but we had to sign this card for Merry today. It was so sad. Her dad died Wednesday. Sunday, at Youth Group, the Murphies told me about it. I felt absolutely heartbroken. I can't even imagine living in a world where my dad isn't. It makes me feel so small and pathetic....

It's freezing out. Absolutely freezing. Hastings was supposed to call me last night, but I don't know if he did because I went out to dinner. STUPID. *sigh* I asked him to come tonight. I don't know if he will, but it's making me even more excited thinking about it. I need it.

I've been thinking about life and death a lot, since Merry's dad died. What would I do if that happened? I'd probably not be able to speak or do anything for weeks, maybe months. I'd just sit there, remembering all the good times with him. I've realized that I don't have a whole lot to hold on to. It really makes me want to be with him more. :( But if I do, I know Mary will be so angry with me. She thinks I'm supposed to love her more than him. Or so it seems. I just really don't know what to do. I want to be happy, I do, but what if it makes Mary freak out? I'd never be able to forgive myself.

I felt really lonely today. Just seeing all of my friends together-laughing, hugging, playing, teasing, flirting and those looks makes me feel so alone. It's not right for me to feel this way. Especially because I am so happy for them.

What can I do? I can't help how I feel, can I? Oh well. Whatever. I'll get over it....I hope.

Anyhow, I'm going to go and see if Rhiannon has emailed our RP back. If she has, I'll be a whole ton of a lot happier. Keep your fingers crossed!

xoxo

Wiped Out-Mind and Body

2007-01-22T20:59:00.000-07:00

Mmm. Today was extremely tiring. I got no sleep this weekend and then I got up to get ready, right? And we have a snow day! You have absolutely no idea how pissed I was. I could have gotten a whole hour and a half more of sleep! Not cool, I tell you.

Friends were pretty cool today. I love them, you know? They just sometimes get annoying. Everyone does sometimes...

Mary is kicking me off. Gosh. I can't get any respect around here.

Catch ya.

Iz

Kind of Tired, A Little Drifty

2007-01-21T20:25:00.000-07:00

Hmm. When was my last post? Wednesday? Thursday? Whatever. I was at Miguel's this weekend. Pretty fun. I didn't really do anything. Just RP'd and emailed a lot. Watched TV.

But....I have hope now. Hastings has brought me hope again....I feel so alone because everyone is together and I missed him. And he's come back. ^^

xoxo

I love it.

2007-01-17T18:40:00.000-07:00

Hey y'all. Mmmm. Today was very...I don't know. Different, I guess. There was registration for next year and that just freaked me out. Just when I think I've found my place-my niche-and BOOM! You're halfway through the year, you better start thinking about next year! Man, it just sucks! And then everything else sucked. Summer and Kit kind of left me out today after Lindsey got back. It kinda sucked but what can you do, right?

You know, I wonder whether people like me, yes I'm going to put myself in this category-people like writers and artists and musicians see the world in a different way. Miguel told me he thought so, and maybe that's why I feel different, why I am so different. I'm not sure I believe him, but I was thinking about that today, when we were driving to school. I saw the trees and plants shaking, I saw a bag in the sky, I saw a crow and how everything seemed so vivid and bright....I wonder if it's true?

The First Day Here

2007-01-16T18:54:00.000-07:00

Heya everyone. It's Izzy here. And I have a blog! *dancedance* What fun. And waaaaay better than MySpace, I must say. M'kay. So...my day was pretty good. I was wearing bad shoes though and kept slipping and almost killed myself-which isn't saying a lot, really. Hehe.

Mary and I had a fight today. I am so mad at her, I can't breathe, almost. It just sucks. Because we're always fighting. And I hate it.

Cheers.

Izzy